


Discovering Adina

by 1kinkyslytherin



Category: Sorority Boys (2002)
Genre: Trans Character
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-26
Updated: 2019-08-24
Packaged: 2019-09-27 20:59:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 10,290
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17169293
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/1kinkyslytherin/pseuds/1kinkyslytherin
Summary: what happens when their masquerade really is who they are





	1. Getting Started

_ Oh My God, this can't be happening,  _ I think as Dave, Doofer, and myself, pull into the dark and dimly lit parking lot of the closest Goodwill.  _ I can’t believe I let them talk me into this. Why did I let them talk me into this ridiculous plan? This has got to be the worst idea anyone has ever thought of. I can't believe I'm really going to do this. How in the world did I ever let them talk me into this? _

 

“You know this won’t work, right? No one is ever going to believe that we’re chicks,” I say as we walk to the doors. “It’s not gonna be possible. We’ll never even get in the freaking door.”

 

“Adam this is the only plan we have,” said Dave as he stopped and turned around to face me. “If you can come up with a better one, any one, I’m all ears.”

 

I stood there just outside the doors to the building, hands in the pockets of my sweatshirt looking down at my shoes, unable to come up with an answer. 

 

“I didn’t think so. Let’s hurry up, the party starts in an hour.”

 

“Yeah,” said Doofer. “I mean, it’s gonna be easy for me to find stuff, but for you two, much harder.”

 

Me and Dave looked at each other and roll our eyes simultaneously.  _ Sure Doofer, sure. _

 

I put up little resistance as Dave and Doofer dragged me inside and towards the women's section. I try and go over by the pants for something normal looking to wear, but Dave pulls me over to a dressing room and shoves me in with a bunch of clothes in my hands.

 

“What the hell Dave?” I yell as he pushes me into a dressing room and shuts the door behind me.

 

“Try the stuff on, and don’t think about trying to get out of there before I’m back,” he yelled back through the door before walking away.

 

I let out a small sigh and sat down on the stained bunch that was built into the wall,  _ worst idea ever. _

 

After two more armfuls of clothes being shoved into the small fitting room and what seemed like a zillion shoes, I had the clothes I was going to wear. A slightly small gold skirt with the face of a lion on the front, a mismatched blue sweater, and a pair of high heels. They, with every step I took, threatened to slip off my feet and make me trip, but they were the only ones that fit and were the easiest to walk in.

 

I was finally let out of the dressing room once they had also found their own clothes. Dave had a dark blue dress and a long off white sweater. Doofer had found a jean dress and a pink tie dye shirt to go underneath. 

 

“Are you sure that's what you want to wear?” Asked Dave looking over the clothes that I had chosen and was carrying in my arms.

 

“You have got to be kidding me?! It isn't going to be a fashion contest. Besides everything else either didn't fit, or was uglier than this,” I say, disgust coming out loud and clear in my voice.

 

They then dragged me once again through the store over to the jewelry and makeup area. First they looked at the wigs, there were six. One shoulder length dirty blond, two short and curly wigs, one blue, one black. The last two were longer, one curly and red, the other wavy and brown, the last was black and straight. 

 

“Ok, well the short ones are out, we already have short hair, as well as the blue and black.” Dave decided, “Doofer the red one, I think it’s the best for you.”

 

“Alright. Well I think you should go with the brown one then, I don’t think blond is your color.” Doofer replied.

 

“So that leaves the blond to you Adam,” said Dave as he handed me the blond wig.

 

“Great,” I deadpanned as my upper lip curled into a sneer. 

 

I barely paid attention to Dave and Doofer as they go through the jewelry next to the wigs, and it’s not long before we’re heading over to the check out. The cashier gives us funny looks till Dave mentions a costume party, and stops looking at us so weirdly. Once we're done I grab a bag and get out of there as fast as I can. As we go to leave the parking lot Dave skids to a halt. 

 

“Why are you stopping? We need to go, the party has already started, and I want this over with as fast as possible,” I almost scream at Dave.

 

“Where are we going to get dressed?” Dave asks. “We can’t exactly do it in the car, or in the middle of a parking lot.”

 

“There’s a gas station just down the road from the house that has a unlocked bathroom on the outside. We can park in front of the door, go in, get dressed and come out without anyone the wiser,” I said quickly. I wanted this nightmare done and over with.

 

DISCOVERING ADINA

 

Once we get inside we decided to split up which gave me bad Scooby Doo flashbacks, mostly about Daphne falling into some horrible trap once they split up to “search for clues”. Every episode, or pretty much every episode something bad happens after they separate. As I walked through the house I continued having bad Scooby vibes about the whole thing. 

 

It didn’t take long to wade for me to wade through the crowd and over to the stairs, climbing the stairs in heels was a whole other matter. Every small unbalanced step up the stairs caused my legs to shake with the unaccustomed feeling of walking in heels. The walk to our room after reaching the top of the stairs was a cakewalk compared to how difficult walking up them had been.

 

I opened the door and went inside, intent on getting in and out with the tape as fast as I could. When a light flashed on, I turned around and raised my hands in shock. It was Jimmy, wearing nothing but a robe.

 

_ Oh crap. He isn't supposed to be in here, why is he here? _ I thought to myself as I looked at Jimmy, frozen in shock.

 

“Hey Nonny Nonny,” he said as he looked at me in a way that made my skin crawl.

 

“Excuse me. Is this your room?” I asked in the girliest voice I could muster.

 

“It is now, now that I'm the new head of the Social Committee.” 

 

_ Crap, that little rat. _

 

“Did Little Red Riding Hood lose her way to Grandma's bathroom?” He asked while touching at his exposed nipple.

 

I shuddered in disgust and answered, “yes... I have to tinkle.” Just hoping to get out of there, I turned to leave yet he somehow got to the door before me. Despite being all the way across on the other side of the room, while I was standing right next to the door. 

 

“Tell me your name and I won't follow you home tonight,” He said as he pressed up against me.

 

“Ah ... Dina,” I managed to squeak out.

 

“What?”

 

“Adina. My name is Adina. What are you doing?” I asked in a panic as he started to take off his robe.

 

He didn't answer as he stood before me completely naked, everything on display. 

 

 _Oh My God, why am I staring, don’t look,_ I screamed to myself in my head. I couldn’t stop the gasp that come out of my mouth. I shuddered in disgust, _I need to get out of here._

 

“It gets a lot bigger,” He said looking slightly embarrassed as he looked down at himself. 

 

“I gotta go,” I squeaked out as I pushed past him and ran out of the room as fast as I could in heels.

 

I eventually found Daisy and Roberta sitting together on one of the couches in one of the living rooms downstairs.

 

“I couldn’t get the tape, Jimmy’s moved into our old room. I couldn’t get past him... God this dress is so tight,” I said as I tried to pull the hem of the skirt down to cover my upper thighs and underwear as it tried to ride up even higher.

 

“I told you,” says Daisy.

 

“Yeah well you don’t have the best selection when you shop at Goodwill now do you?” I spat back.

 

DISCOVERING ADINA

 

I felt hands all over me, my own, Dave’s, Doofer’s and the other KOK members as we’re taken from the house and dumped on the DOG house steps. The ones that are the other KOK members are all over my fake breasts, ass and groin. As we untangled ourselves from the net I couldn’t help but feel incredibly violated, and the fact that I was dressed the way that I was only seemed to magnify how violated it made me feel. Like it’s so much more worse that they touched me that way as Adina.

 

Seeing where we are I tried to get us out of their as fast as we could. But when the DOG members came pouring out of the house and then the President mentioned food. Well, It was hard to pass up, it also helped that we had no money, way to get money, or any other way to get food.

 

DISCOVERING ADINA

 

Pledging DOG just added to my growing list of bad ideas since Doofer suggested we dress up as chicks to try and get in the house, to get the tape that may or may not have Spencer on it stealing the money. 

 

I shuddered quietly as I laid under the covers of my new bed in the DOG house. Seeing Jimmy's dick was horrible. I mean I have tons of sex, and seen tons of porn, I even have made my own, so I know what I guys stuff looks like, but seeing Jimmy’s. That was beyond torture. Despite all the sex I've had with girls in the past, I never really liked girls all that much. Sure sex was fun, more than fun, but the girls had never really been a huge part of it. Their was a reason they never came around again, I didn’t want them to come back, they were simply a means to an end. Not that that made me like the other guys in the house that did the same thing, they did it simply because they could, to sleep with as many girls as they could, it was a game to them. That’s how the walk of shame board got started. I could tell I was different than the other guys, they would always brag up their conquests, but to me it was never a big deal, and that made me the odd one out. So I changed, made the board, and acted more like the other guys when it came to how they talked and treated women.

 

I continued to toss and turn for the rest of the night, waking twice from nightmares about Jimmy trying to do things to me, gross things. In the morning I thankful for the makeup that came with dressing up like a girl, for only for the fact that it helped to hide the huge dark circles that had developed under my eyes from lack of sleep. 

 

After looking through the closet of mismatched clothes that had been left by previous DOG girls I found a shirt and skirt that kind of looked good together. I also spied a ribbon with a flower on it that also looked like it would look good with the shirt. As I fastened it around my throat so that it covered my Adams apple, I noticed my dick sticking out a little. Quickly I pushed it back into place so that it couldn’t be seen and give me away.

 

“How do I look?” I asked as I gave a little twirl, slightly tripping because of the heels I was wearing.

 

“Well I... Personally I think you look better with two tits,” said Daisy pointing out that I had forgotten a boob, as she stood up and walked over to me.

 

“Oh shit,” I said looking down. “What happened to my other-” I looked up when I heard a loud slurp to see Doofer sitting nearby, eating an orange. 

 

“Hey! You’re eating my boob,” I yelled at Doofer who, at my words, started to choke on the orange. Then he started rubbing his hand over his tongue like he was trying to get something gross off of it.

 

“Look, just try to pay a little more attention to the details, ya know? We don’t have to be babes, just believeable. By this time tomorrow, we’ll be back in the house. After that we repress and deny all memories of this whole experience,” said Daisy trying to reassure me as he crumpled up something and put it in the other side of the bra I was wearing giving me two boobs.

 

Somehow I knew that as soon as he said it, I knew it wouldn't be that easy to just simply forget this, and move on.


	2. Starting to Break

Just when I think things are doing ok, that I have some kind of handle on this pretending to be a chick thing, I run into Jimmy. Or he runs into me.

 

“Well, well, well. Coinky dinky, my stinky pinky. Here we are again,” he says as he forces me backwards and presses me up against a wall. I being to have trouble breathing, between his skunk like cologne and him being so close to me. 

 

Despite my size and the fact that I could kick his ass if I wanted to, he backs me up against the wall with no trouble. I don’t understand why but the second my back touches the wall, I can’t breath. I feel trapped, helpless, and terrified, but I don’t know why. The night before flashes through my mind, finding him in my room, and KOK guys groping me while I’m tangled in the net with Dave and Doofer. Then just as I start to get light headed I feel something hard pressing against the book I’m holding in front of me. Realizing what it is I try get out of there. When he starts sliding something into my shirt, I finally break free and get away. I don’t stop going till I'm sitting in an abandoned stairwell trying to breath, tears making the makeup on my face run. 

 

_ Why is this affecting me so much? _ I ask myself, as I pull the offending piece of paper out of my shirt, only to throw it as far away from me as I can, down the stairwell.  _ It's not like anythings different. I'm still me right? I'm still Adam?  _ The fact that nothing's really happened doesn't escape me, but it doesn't make the panic inside me any less strong, any less paralyzing.

 

I don’t even know how long I sit there but when I hear the five minute warning bell, signaling that there's only five minutes left of class, I run to a bathroom and lock myself in a stall. I stay there the whole day till the end of classes, then I try to rush back to the DOG house, the heels on my feet making it hard to walk in let alone run. A block and a half away from the house two guys driving past in a car yell “fat ass, dog girl” at me as they drive by, then throw a drink at me. It takes me the rest of the walk back to the DOG house and a few minutes standing outside the door for the newly found tears to stop streaming down my already tear stained face.

 

After yelling at the three girls sitting in the living room, whose names I can’t remember, I try to go up the stairs finally tripping over the shoes that have been threatening to trip me all day, after only two steps.

 

When I get to the room, I shut the door and yell, “ I can’t take this!”  _ I can't take the constantly feeling worthless. Nobody think’s Adina is pretty, probably not even Jimmy. He just sees her as a way to get his  _ numbers _ up. Was it only when you were beautiful did people think you’re worth something?  _ That final thought made my blood run cold. If that was true then nobody would ever think anything of Adina. She wasn’t what anyone could call beautiful.

 

When Daisy asks me what my problem is, I yell about the bra rubbing my skin raw, my “fat ass”, and the shoes I’m wearing that keep making me twist my ankle. When really they're nothing compared to the fear, terror, and confusion that is going through my mind, that I can’t even make sense of. 

 

When I realize they won’t get it unless I tell them about the other stuff, and maybe not even then, I give up and go hide in a stall in the DOG bathroom till it gets dark. Only leaving when my stomach starts hurting from lack of food.

 

DISCOVERING ADINA

 

Two days later I decide that I really can’t take another second of this, that it’s all becoming too much for me. When I go to tell Daisy and Roberta, Roberta announces another plan. One that I hate even more than the first plan that got us into this whole mess in the first place. He wants me to go out on a date, with Jimmy. Then when he calls Jimmy my boyfriend it takes everything in me for me not to break down right then and there. 

 

And once again they convince me to go along with another plan. I tell myself that it's easier to just go along, that this whole thing won’t be over until we get that tape. 

 

So I call Jimmy, and he jumps at the chance to take Adina out. Inside I'm quaking in fear, and fighting back tears. 

 

When we get back to my old room Jimmy quickly turns off the lights and by the time I switch them back on he’s only wearing a robe again.

 

“No,” I whisper to myself as I see Jimmy in the robe again, knowing exactly what he wants to do.

 

“Come in,” he says to me despite me already being in the room. “Take a load off.”

 

I brush Jimmy’s hand off my shoulder.

 

“So you like my robe baby?” He asks as he touches himself through the robe running his hands down his chest. “I only settle for the very best... Let’s fuck.”

 

As he launches himself at me I can't help but put my hand up and push him away, suggesting a drink first, to loosen things up, and given me a chance to drug him.

 

DISCOVERING ADINA

 

As I slowly drift in and out of consciousness I realize my arms are wrapped around someone. I squeeze my eyes shut for fear of what I’ll see if I open them. After a few minutes I get up enough courage to open my eyes, and I see my worst fears realized. I'm in bed with Jimmy.

 

I take many deep breaths trying to calm myself down and stop myself from hyperventilating, but it doesn't work. I quickly leaned over the side of the bed as last night's dinner made a reappearance. After a minute or so I sit back up trying to get my breathing under control, a strong acidic burn in my throat, and tears threatening to fall from my eyes. After a few minutes I'm calmer, I turn to look to see where the tape is. As I look around the floor I noticed the box full of porn tapes is gone. This sends me into an even bigger panic. It makes everything I went through worthless because I don't have the tape. I'm so angry, and I can't even think straight. I'm so confused and disoriented the by the time I get in the hall I realize my biggest mistake so far. In the hallway is the whole KOK house making me do the walk of shame. I walk down the hall as fast as I can, punching a guy halfway down the hall then tripping over my shoes again. Though not without a little help from one of the KOK guys, who just happened to have his foot there at that moment. By the time I get to the end of the hall and they take my picture, and my face is once again covered with tears. I run out of the house as fast as I can desperate to get inside the DOG house. 

 

Once inside I don't stop till I get to the room I share with Daisy and Roberta. When I do I can't go in, for fear of running into Dave, and Doofer and having them ask questions. I had no idea it would be anything like that, the walk of shame. It was so degrading, so horrible to walk down that hall, I wanted to die. I can't believe I let that happened to all those girls, now knowing how horrible it is. 

 

When I finally get enough strength to go in,  Roberta asks me where I was, and I try to lie but when I go to sit down something pokes me. I stand up to find dried cum on my skirt. I stand in shock. I can't move. I can't breathe. I barely even realize Daisy when she comes walking into the room. He then has the nerve to ask where the tape is.  

 

“The Tape? Oh, the  _ tape _ ... Let me tell you about the tape Dave. somewhere between the ribs and the Rohypnol, I had the tape. But what happened? You fucked me over Dave! And now the tape is in a blue crate on it’s way to the boat.”

 

“So... you didn’t get the tape?” He asked, looking confused as to why I’m angry.

 

“Where were you last night Dave? What happened to the wingman?”

 

All I can think is how did he let this happen to me, he was supposed to help me,  _ protect _ me. I take one look at face and I know that he was with Leah. I feel so betrayed. 

 

I barely pay attention as we throw words back and forth at each other but when he says I'll never be half the woman she is, I break.  _ How could he say that? He has no right to say that. _ He doesn't know the real me. He knows Adam, the man whore, frat guy. He doesn't know that Adina is closer to the real me then Adam will ever be, than even I knew she could be.

 

“You take that back.”

 

“No.”

 

“You take it back,” I cry.

 

“No.”

 

“I real friend would have had my back last night,” I say feeling betrayed.

 

“Looks like Jimmy got there first,” says Dave satisfaction laced with cruelty in his voice.

 

As Dave goes to leave I tackle him in a fit of rage. As we fight he kicks me in the balls making the pain fuel my anger at him even stronger. Then with a well aimed shot with a hairbrush I knock him over the balcony, sending him tumbling to the ground below. I run down the stairs, anger fueling my movements. Somehow we end up on the front lawn. I can't stand it anymore and I break down. I make up some shit about thinking I'm so ugly that I wouldn’t fuck me. That was only partly true I did think I was ugly, but I don’t even know if I like women anymore, I’m that confused. Just as I go to punch him he distracts me again with a new plan. Despite the fact that I know he's manipulating me I agree to yet another bad plan.

 

_ Football. _

 

I loved it, it was one of the best things I loved about being in a frat, there were always guys who were happy to start up a game.

 

As I play football with the DOG girls against the Tri-Pi’s I feel terrible. Then when a Tri-Pi mentions what Jimmy had been telling people, making everyone think that what he was saying happened between me and him. I hide the tears that spring up and fight the urge to collapse and fall apart right then and there. 


	3. Revelations

As I get ready for KOKtail cruise, doing my makeup, getting dressed, making sure I have two boobs not just one, I start to notice how different it felt. It wasn’t a bad different, good different, interesting. It was easy, relaxing even, dressing as a woman, and how despite how different it was it felt more comfortable and right than any male clothing had ever made me feel. It wasn't just the clothes. It was how I looked in the clothes, how I felt in the clothes. How despite everything, I felt like myself, more than I ever had before. 

I’ve felt more confused than I did right now. I couldn't understand the way I felt, and the more I felt, the more I wanted to stop. I wanted to stop because I couldn't understand what was going on, yet even thinking of stopping made my heart hurt and felt like the worst thing in the world.

DISCOVERING ADINA

As I stood on the pier with the rest of the DOG girls looking at the cruise ship moving further away. Despair settled on me like a heavy blanket, it was over, there was no way we were going to get that tape back now. 

Unlike normal instead of Daisy or Roberta coming up with a plan it was Leah who had an idea. It took a few minutes to find a boat that was big enough for all of us. It was easy to grab the Tri Pi’s and get them off the boat and into a inflatable raft, and just as the guys started to wonder where Tri Pi’s went, we appeared. 

It didn't take long for Jimmy to spot me. He was sitting on the side of the boat, just as he set his gaze on me it made my skin crawl. It took all my strength not to bolt away as he started to come near me. The first chance I got to get away from him I took, giving him an excuse I needed to go to the bathroom. I ran below deck as fast as my heels could carry me, bursting into the first room I found. Closing the door behind me I hid along the side of the bed out of view of the door. A few minutes later someone came in, I ducked down hoping it wasn't Jimmy. Just as the person was leaving I realized it was Dave, changing out of Daisy’s clothes for his interview. Ten minutes later someone else came into the room. Once I was sure it was Dave, I stood up.

“Woah, what are you doing?”

“Hiding from Jimmy,” I replied.

“Can you zip up my dress,” Daisy asked as he turned around.

Just as I went to zip the dress Leah came rushing in. She then assumed we had been doing stuff together and took off. I had to stop Daisy from running after her. We still needed to find the tape.

Once Daisy was fully dressed we left the room to go look for the tape. Only to hear a whistle and the words ”dog catcher” ring through the air.

“Leah,” exclaimed Daisy, before taking off to go upstairs.

Despite needing to find the tape I gave in and followed Daisy up the stairs. I got there just in time to see Daisy take her wig off revealing herself as Dave. As everyone was looking around in shock Jimmy came running up to me.

“Give us another chance! ... I can live with the fact that you don’t love me, but maybe with time you could learn to-”

“Hey,” I say cutting him off. “It ain’t gonna happen.”

I would rather die, I think to myself.

I then took my own wig off. Showing everyone who I was.

“I am dude,” I said as Jimmy turned green once he realized just who he had been lusting after.

DISCOVERING ADINA

As new president of KOK I got rid the Walk of Shame, and the Hall of Shame. I was horrified when I got back in my old KOK room to discover the picture of Adina tacked up on the board, I couldn’t help up throw up then and there at seeing Adina up on the board. I ripped the board down, then ran down stairs and threw it in the burning fire of the main fireplace, not even bothering to stay and watch it burn.

I also got rid of the dildo slingshot and tried to get the guys to be more nicer to the DOG sisters. But most of all I tried to stay away from Jimmy, even after knowing who I was he still had that look in his eyes. The same one that said he wanted to fuck Adina. But the thing that was the hardest was the emptiness inside. The place where Adina belonged. If I thought it was confusing to be Adina it was even more confusing to not be Adina. I just didn't understand it, even less than I did before it was over. 

As the days went by I got twitchy, easily irritated, and distracted. I felt something was missing, I just couldn’t figure out what it was. I thought that once I got back in the house and out of girls clothes things would just go back to normal. But things only got worse and I felt stranger than ever. I didn't do anything out of the ordinary I just went back to my life, minus the whole banging Tri Pi’s. The first day back I tried to go back to jacking off in bed, but nothing would get it up. I just couldn't. Whether it was just from my time at the DOG house, or I just couldn't take it anymore, either way nothing worked. 

DISCOVERING ADINA

It was almost a week after the cruise, when I figured out what was bugging me. After days of constantly looking at girls, not at their bodies, but what they were wearing, makeup, jewelry, clothes, shoes. What I was missing, was being Adina. Dave and Doofer had come out of the whole tape situation with girlfriends. Me I came out wanting to be back in girl's clothes, to be a girl again. Not that I admitted that for a few days. Once I realized it I couldn't move. I just sat there, thinking. The thoughts that were going through my head was “it isn't normal, it isn't normal”, but the more I thought, the more I wanted to be Adina again. 

But how, I thought to myself. The party! It was perfect as president of KOK I should go over and talk to them about the party. Then when they're not looking, I can go upstairs and into Adina's room. 

DISCOVERING ADINA

It took an absurdly long time talking to Leah about the party, but when it was finally over I looked around to make sure no one would see me and I dashed up the stairs. I didn't stop running till I made it to Adina's room. Once inside I locked the door and just to be careful I put a chair under the door handle so no one could get in. Oh my god, just even being in this room makes me feel better. 

Everything was exactly where we left it, wigs on the desks, clothes in the closets. It didn't take long to get dressed again as Adina. After I was finished getting dressed I felt like I had just smoked some of Doofer’s best weed. I hadn't felt this good in... forever. Despite it only being six at night I felt so good that I couldn't help but lay down on my old bed, completely content. 

When I woke up I could tell it was early in the morning but I'd never felt better in my whole life. I just laid there basking in the feeling of feeling amazing, then I started to wonder why that was. I mean I was just asleep, wasn't I? But then I remembered. I was in the DOG house, I was once again dressed as Adina. 

Why do I feel so good to be dressed to the Adina again?

The more I thought, I began to realize the answer to exactly why I liked girls. I always knew it wasn't really sexually, but now I realized it was envy. 

I want to be girl, I thought to myself.

Being closer to girls made it easier. That thought starts me reeling. How is that possible, that I wanted to be a girl. It had never even crossed my mind, I was a boy, wasn't I? But then again I never really liked my equipment, I always put it off as it being too small or something. Then there were some days I wish it would just go away, that everything would be easier without it. I looked over at the mirror on the closet door, the longer I looked in the mirror at Adina the more I saw myself, and who I saw wasn't Adam.


	4. Starting to Accept

After the startling revelation that I had, I change my clothes and get out of the DOG house as fast as I can. I have to be wrong right? There was no way I wanted to be a chick. It had to be some sort of fluke, guys didn't want to be girls. 

DISCOVERING ADINA

In the weeks following my revelation I threw myself back into the way it was before. Huge parties at the KOK house full of slutly Tri Pi’s. I had sex with as many as I could, only able to get it up while thinking of other things, each time felt worse than the last. But I just kept doing it anyways, despite the fact that every time I had sex with a Tri Pi it got harder and harder to get it up. There was no way I wanted to be a girl. It just wasn't possible. Was it?

When Dave asks me what's going on later, I lie and say I'm just getting back into the swing of things. I don't think he buys it but he doesn't out right question it. 

It isn’t until I can't even think about or look at a naked woman sexually without wanting to throw up. Let alone at the thought of having sex with one, that I realized it isn't helping. I couldn't deny that I wanted to be a chick anymore. It was too hard, it hurt too much. Denying that I want to be a girl wasn’t worth it. 

So I stopped the partying. I went back to sneaking over to the DOG house at night to become Adina again. 

DISCOVERING ADINA

It takes me a week or so to realize it but, Jimmy was stalking me. So at night whenever I left to go to the DOG house to become Adina I would take a walk, find a way to lose him and sneak back to the DOG house. 

After one night where it took almost an hour to lose Jimmy, I made a mistake. Once I got to the dog house and into Adina's clothes I forgot to lock the door. It was still early so I got dressed in day clothes instead of pajamas. I was just finished tucking my dick back in my underwear to make me look flat in the front when I heard the door creak open. There was a small gasp of shock, I was caught. We each just stood there never making a sound, after a minute or so and by I took a deep breath and turned around. And came face to face with Leah and Dave. 

“What’s going on here Adam?”

“I-I ...” I try to get words out but they won't come. I just stand there, my mouth trying to form words but failing.

“Why are you dressing as Adina? Have you been doing this since the cruise?” Asks Dave. 

I shake my head no not trusting my voice. I want nothing more for them to have not seen this. 

“Well then what’s going on?”

“Dave stop asking questions. He can barely answer one,” chimes in Leah.

“Well something's going on, and I want to know what it is.”

“Why don't we go to my room. Adam, why don’t you finished changing . Then come to my room when you're done so we can all talk about this.”

I don't wanna talk about this, I think to myself. But I nod my head yes anyways. 

DISCOVERING ADINA

I consider putting my regular clothes back on, but it wouldn't change anything so I finished getting dressed as slowly as possible trying to delay the inevitable. I stick my head out the door to make sure no one's looking then make my way to Leah's room. I knock on the door quickly trying not to be seen by someone else. 

“Come in.”

I take a deep breath and go in, shutting the door behind me. For a while I just stand there staring at them as they stare at me.

It’s Leah who finally speaks, “why don't you sit down.” She says pointing to the chair at her desk.

After another bout of silence Dave asks, “ is this why you were acting weird a couple of weeks ago?”

“Yeah,” I replied quietly .

“If you don't mind me asking. what exactly are you doing? I mean I know what you're doing. But why?” Asks Leah.

“I- I, I don't know how to explain.”

“Well can you explain why you were acting weird couple of weeks ago?”

“I felt I needed to.”

“Needed to what? Bang Tri Pi’s like they were going out of style?” Asked Dave.

I grimaced at the thought, and nodded yes. 

“Why would you feel the need to do that? I mean I can understand having needs but ... You did anything and everything, and it seems like you never got enough.” 

“That wasn't why,” I say. “I was trying to do something.”

“What? Get an STD, get someone pregnant? What?”

“I was trying to be normal,” I say quietly. 

“What? You are normal.” States Dave.

“No, I'm not.” I say getting more frustrated.

“Why don't you think you're normal?” Asks Leah, seeing how frustrated I was getting.

“Because I don't want to be me. I want to be Adina!”

“Wait, what?”

“I don't want to be Adam anymore. I don't think I ever have.”

“Wait are you saying you're transgender?” Asks Leah who seems to be catching on.

I put my head down, nodding yes. I can't bear to let them see the tears in my eyes. It was good that I went to the library to look it up what it is I was, otherwise I wouldn't have known what the word transgender meant.

“Trans what?”

“Transgender. It's when somebody of one gender realize that the gender they're born with isn't the one they should be.” Explains Leah.

“So you think you're really a girl?” He asks voice full of unasked questions. 

I nod again my eyes still cast to the floor. I can't even think about looking up to see their faces. Imagining the disgust in their eyes.


	5. Accepting Adina

 

After I admitted that I want to be a girl it was easy to then explain that I never liked girls that always liked guys but hid it and never did anything about because it wasn't normal for guys to like guys. That being Adina made me more happy than I've ever been. Dave didn't really get it but, he told me he would support me always. That it didn't matter if I was Adam or Adina we have been best friends longer than either of us could remember, a little thing like this wasn't going to change that. Leah promised I would have the whole DOG house behind my back. After talking to them some more Leah said that she thought I should see a psychologist. Not to fix me, but to help me understand what I was going through and, accept that I wanted to be a woman not a man. She also said that it would help in the future. Especially if I decided I wanted to do more than just dress up as Adina. She also asked if it would be okay to tell the DOG girls about me being transgender and everything. I told her yes not seeing a reason to say no. Plus it would make it easier being around the girls again. During that week I realized it's for me easier to be around girls then it was guys. I had always felt some level of uncomfortableness around guys, no matter what situation.

 

DISCOVERING ADINA

 

A week later with Leah’s help I found a doctor to go to, I promised to go, with the promise that she would come with me, at least at first.

 

Sitting in the slightly cold waiting room waiting for my name to be called I was a nervous wreck. I couldn't stop tapping my fingers and flipping through magazines not really looking at anything in them just trying to make the time go faster. 

 

It seemed like forever before my name was called. The receptionist led me into a corridor and to a open door.

 

“Dr. Turner, your four o’clock is ready”, she said to the doctor as we got to the door. “ You can go in.”

 

As she made her way back down the corridor I was ready to bolt when Leah grabbed my hand and walked me into the room. 

 

DISCOVERING ADINA

 

Going to the doctor wasn't as bad as I thought it was going to be. He was nice and with Leah there it was easy to talk to him. After two more appointments with him Leah didn't need to come along with me anymore. 

 

The following days I barely spent any time at the KOK house and more and more time at the DOG house. I was barely spending any time at KOK despite my presidential duties. The only time I spent there was when it was absolutely necessary. That also meant that I didn't dress as Adam anymore except go there. I was pretty much living as Adina full time at the DOG house. All the girls were pretty understanding, a few took a little bit to get used to it and understand it more. Only one left, but she was super religious. 

 

After Leah had explained to them about me and what being transgender was, they took me on a group shopping trip for Adina. Which meant no more ill fitting goodwill or hand me down clothes for Adina. Which according to the girls made all the difference in the world, with the new change of wardrobe everyone thought Adina was more beautiful than ever. She now had a more feminine look to her that she never had before, which made her all the more real. Gone were the ill fitting clothes, and awkward outfits, in their place were size and style correct clothes that downplayed Adina’s big ass, and accentuated her body in all the right places. I felt more like the girl I wanted to be in my new clothes, and less like the boy in a dress I wanted to get rid of. Now when I looked in the mirror I saw a girl, who despite having a large statue looked no less like the girl she was.

 

Then not long after the group shopping trip the girls decided I needed crash course in how to take care of myself as a girl. Which meant how to do my nails, hair, makeup, where and how to get rid of body hair, to avoid ingrown hairs. As well little things like walking in general and then in high heels, eating with my mouth closed, and how to sit, meaning with my legs closed. The one thing that everyone agreed unanimously on, was Adina’s wig. Everyone thought that the shoulder length blond hair suited her, and therefore so no need to change it. But they said I should start to grow out my hair anyway, and maybe when it was long enough, dye it to match the blond locks of the wig. The girls all agreed that my dark hair didn’t suit me, that blond was more my color.

 

As the days went by it became harder and harder to dress as Adam. It was even getting hard to talk like Adam, I had started to go to speech therapy with Katie so I would be able to sound more feminine without it being really high pitched and flawed like before. Adam slowly and surely began disappearing. So much so that it was rare to see ever Adam. About as rare as a Bigfoot sighting, as Adam was disappearing Adina was emerging. No one except the DOG sisters, Dave, and Doofer really knew what was going on. Well except for Jimmy who was becoming even creepier and more stalker like the more Adina emerged. No doubt hoping to have another chance to be with Adina. But even he didn’t really know the whole story.

 

DISCOVERING ADINA

 

As more time went by it was common to see Adina around, so much so that the KOK brothers were asking questions whenever anyone slightly related to the DOG house was around. By this time Adam was practically non-existent only showing up as Adam to KOK meetings. It finally became too much when at the latest KOK meeting no one did anything except stare at me, silent questions filling the silence.

 

_ No better time, _ I thought.  _ Might as well get it over with _ .

 

“As most of you may have noticed I haven't been around very often past couple of weeks and most of you have probably noticed someone else being around. I know you're all expecting answers, but I don't know how to answer them, at least not in a way that you’ll understand anyways. So effective immediately I am relinquishing my role as president of KOK.”

 

Everyone then started shouting out questions demanding answers, but this wasn't my place anymore so I turned and left. I didn't even need to go upstairs to my old room. Adina had no need for Adam’s things, she had everything she wanted already.

 

DISCOVERING ADINA

 

The more I opened myself up to Adina the more I remembered about myself. When I was young I realized I was different from other people. So I hid and tried to act like everyone else. As I did that I lost pieces of me the longer I hid them. Like my old favorite color, pink. The name I used to dream I had, Anna, though now I like Adina better. Like the disgust and undeniable urge to find some way to get rid of my penis whenever I saw it, let alone thought about it. The way I would cry myself to sleep at night, questioning why I was so different, why I couldn’t be like everyone else. The small collection of makeup I’d taken from my mother, but then got rid of when I made an effort to make myself normal.

 

As the therapy got more intense, more memories began to surface, making Adam seem like the alter ego and the Adina the real person.

 

DISCOVERING ADINA

 

“It’s been over two months of therapy now Adina. With that and the support from your sorority sisters, not to mention your mental attitude, if you truly wish to become Adina, physically not just mentally. You can start the hormone treatments soon.” Said Dr.Turner. “If that's what you wish.”

 

I was shocked to say the least, even more so than when I asked him if it was bad that when I thought about Adina, and it was often in the third person. He told me, “no.” that it’s common for transgender people to do that. Primarily because most people never let the real them out of their heads, and when they do they see them as a whole other person inside themselves. 

 

When I had first started all this I hadn't even thought it possible to physically become Adina. And now here was somebody offering me the greatest wish I had that I'd almost forgotten.  

 

“This is so overwhelming. Can I have some time to think, and give you my answer at next week's appointment?”

 

“That's perfectly fine. The point of this is not to rush into things. It's better to make sure you really want it. Then do it just because I suggested it to you. Even if you decide not to start hormones, I think besides just talking to me you should join a transgender support group. It makes it easier to go through things with people around you who are, or have gone through the same things. Going there might even help you make a decision as well.”


	6. New Opportunities

As I walk back to the house I’m in a daze. I can hardly believe it’s possible, _I could really become Adina? Physically?_ I want to, but it seems like such a huge change. Something that couldn't be reversed. _Do I really want to do that? ... I do_ , but like he said it was a huge decision. One I shouldn't make just because I want it now. I stop and pull out the flyer for the transgender support group he gave me. 

 

_ Every Saturday ...  6 to 8, University Community Center, room B.  _

 

Today was Friday so that meant the meeting was tomorrow. _ I'll go,  _ I decided.

 

DISCOVERING ADINA

 

I got there early for the meeting, not wanting to be late and draw attention to myself. There were a few other people there, sitting in the dozen or so chairs spread out in a circle. I quickly chose one and sat down, away from the few other people that were already there. While I sat there waiting for the meeting to begin I kept my head down, tried to remember all the little things that the girls taught me, like keeping my legs closed when sitting with a skirt or dress on, as I try to stop myself from fidgeting as more people arrived. Ever since I stopped being Adam whenever I found myself around new people I became more nervous and twitchy, and often forgot little things. 

 

I'm not sure how long I sat there trying to focus on remaining calm, but when a door banged shut I snapped my head up so fast my neck hurt, in shock from the unexpected sound. I looked over by the doors and saw a man walking over, I recognized him as the one from the flyer. His picture was on it as the doctor who led the group, Dr. Eli Williamson. 

 

“Hello everyone,”  he said as he sat down in a chair. “It looks like we have some new faces today. Welcome everyone, whenever we have some new faces we go round and circle and introduce ourselves, I’ll start. Hello I'm Dr. Eli Williamson and I'm in charge of this group. I have been out and open as transgender for fifteen years and council transgender people and their families. Who’s next? Gina, why don’t you go next?” He asked the girl next to him, who had long blond hair with blue streaks.

 

“OK. Hello, my name is Gina, I started therapy earlier this year and am now going to start hormone treatments next week.” 

 

“Good for you Gina,” chimed in Dr. Williamson.

 

“Thanks,” she replied.

 

As greetings moved from along from person to person, It reminded me of the first night at the DOG house when we introduced ourselves. Only difference is that I was equal parts less and much more nervous now. 

 

“Hello, my name is Ryan. I realized I was transgender two years ago and I’m finally getting my breasts removed in four weeks.”

 

Now it was my turn. 

 

“Hi. My name is A ... Adina. I discovered I was transgender three months ago, and have been going to therapy for the past two months.” Once I'm done I duck my head down, just like I did all those months ago at the DOG house.

 

I didn't say anything the rest of the meeting. I simply sat there and listened to everyone else. It was interesting and kind of comforting to listen to everybody else talk about their experiences, and how they discovered their real selves. It felt good to know that I wasn't the only one, that I wasn't alone.  

 

When the meeting was over everyone got up and said their goodbyes to the people they knew. I awkwardly maneuvered around the groups of people and headed towards the door intent on  leaving without talking to anyone.

 

“Excuse me? Adina?” Asked a voice from behind me. I turn around to see Dr. Williamson a few feet away from me.

 

“Yes.”

 

“Dr. Turner contacted me this morning and he said you might come for the meeting, I'm so happy you did. I find it's easier when you can talk to people about what you're going through and have them actually understand. Not that talking to other people doesn't help but I find it easier when you're talking to somebody who's the same as you.”

 

“Thank you.” I said trying to be polite, when all I wanted was to get out of there. Not that there was any problem, but I just wasn’t comfortable, too many new and unfamiliar people. “Is that all? Because I’m supposed to meet some of my sorority sisters for dinner...”

 

“Of course. Sorry I don't mean to keep you.” 

 

It wasn’t a total lie when I said I had to go meet one of my sorority sisters. I was meeting Dave and Doofer for dinner, and they kind of where my sorority sisters, well Daisy and Roberta were, but that was a technicality.

 

We were meeting at a cafe just down the block from Greek Row, where all the sororities and fraternities were located. It was a favorite of ours, we would go there at least once a week. And when we would go there ever since the start of the tape incident Doofer would order a bacon burger. 

 

“So how did the meeting go?” Asks Dave as he sips on his coke.

 

“OK I guess. It was uncomfortable being around that many new people. It’s difficult for me to talk to anyone about these kinds of things, you know? But otherwise it was ok.”  I say as I pick at my salad, a girl has to watch her figure. 

 

“Well that's good. Oh I forgot to tell you, Jimmy was snooping around again.”

 

“Yeah, He cornered me and just kept asking me all these questions about you the other day. He is getting much creepier,” says Doofer with a shudder.

 

“What do you think I should do Dave?” I ask as I push around bits of lettuce from my salad. A girl's gotta watch her figure you know.

 

“Well you been ignoring and avoiding him for a while, and it doesn't seem to be doing much good. Unless you want to get a restraining order I don’t know if there is much we can do. We’ve all told him to leave you alone, but that isn’t doing much anyways.”

 

For the rest of diner we all tried to think of something, anything to get Jimmy to back off but, we came up with nothing. Deciding to give up for the night we started to walk back to the DOG house. As we got near the house Dave asked,” have you told your family yet?”

 

“What?!” I asked shocked at the sudden question.

 

“I know you don’t talk to them all that much since your parents died but I think you should tell them. You could use their support.”

 

“I have no idea how any of them would react, and you’re right I don’t talk to them the last time I even saw one of them was the day I turned eighteen and I had access to my trust fund, and never had to see them again. You should remember you helped me move out. And you should remember why they don’t talk to me and I don’t talk to them. They never approved of who my mother married and my father was lucky and didn’t have to worry about his parents not liking it because they were already dead. They didn’t like me then what could ever make you think that they would now that I’m transgender. They would freak, they don’t like gay people even and gay people are more accepted than transgender people. They are so old fashioned, look at where they live, in Smallville.” 

 

“I still can’t believe no one ever figured out that the Queens had another son,” says Dave as we get to my room.

 

“It’s not so hard when you look at how much time I spent at your house as I grew up, while my brother Oliver went with our parents all over the world, learning how to run the company... Oh my god, the company. I completely forgot once I’m done with college I’ll be expected to take over the company. How can I do that now, will they even let me with me being transgender? What I am I gonna do?” I ask Dave as I collapsed on my bed and let my head fall into my hands.

 

“OK maybe talking to your grandparents isn't a good idea.” Admits Dave as he sits next to me on his bed. “I don't think they would stop you from running the company, but you never wanted to do that in the first place. Is there some way you could sell it? I know when Oliver and your parents died you got all their stock in the company, not to mention your own stock. You could sell it to the Teague’s or maybe the Luthor’s. I lot of people would give you a ton of money to own Queen Industries, and you could disappear and have your own life as Adina, with having to worry about being transgender.”

 

“That makes so much since. I think I will sell my shares but I don't trust the Teague’s, Lionel Luthor was kinda close to my parents, but he's dead now. All that’s left is lex, but I don't know how to contact him though.”

 

“Me either. And you don't want anyone anyone to find out about you do you? So I guess will have to think about it. We still have two years to figure it all out,” replies Dave as he stands up to leave.


	7. More Changes

“So, how did the meeting go last week Adina?” Asks Dr.Turner as we start the session.

 

“Good. I wasn't as bad as I thought it would be.” I say as I get settled on the chair.

 

“Did you talk in the group? Make any friends?”

 

“No. I didn't feel comfortable talking. And I had to meet Dave and Robert for dinner. So I didn't stick around.”

 

“That's ok Adina. Just listening can do wonders. When you're more comfortable you can talk. Have you given much thought to what we disgust last week?” He asks.

 

“Yes. I don't think I ready yet. It's too soon.”

 

“That's alright Adina.” Says Dr Turner, “it can take years before you're ready to make that step. How about much easier one?”

 

“What do you mean?” I ask him, not understanding what he means.

 

“Have you thought at all about legally changing your name to Adina?”

 

“I can? I never knew I could do that. That would be amazing.” I can't help but break out into a huge smile. “That sounds perfect.”

 

“I lot of my patients don't know that they can change their name. But once they do they jump at the chance. It not a major change, but it's important enough.”

 

Once my hour was up he gave me the information for where I could go to fill out the forms to legally change my name. I was so excited I rushed back to the house to tell the girls, Dave, and Doofer. 

 

They couldn't believe me when I told them. Once they were sure I wasn't joking, they were all real excited for me. 

 

“So are you just going to change it to Adina Queen or are you going to have a middle name?” Asked Katie from somewhere inside the large crowd of girls around me.

 

“I haven't thought that far. Should I? What would it be?”

 

“Yes you totally should,” says Leah from her spot next to Dave.

 

“Could we help you find one?” Asks Patty timidly despite her large stature.

 

“I would love it if you guys would help.”

 

“Tina.”

 

“No, Erica.”

 

“Janet,” shouted out another girl.

 

“Kellie.”

 

“Amber!”

 

As the girls start almost shouting names at me I hear Frederique say something.

 

“Everyone quiet down. What did you say Frederique?”

 

“Michelle. I think it should be Michelle.”

 

“Adina Michelle Queen. I love it!” I’m unable to hide the squeal I make out of happiness at having a new name.

 

The End


End file.
